Author: Doug Riley

OK, I own up. I shouldn’t have said over last night’s lovely dinner in Jaipur ” It looks as though we’re going to get through this holiday without being ill”
En route to Agra and the Taj Mahal, via an amazing fort built in a few years ( in the 17th century ) and abandoned in only a few more, Louise started to feel unwell, followed by me. The visit to the Taj was abandoned, and after a difficult journey to the hotel, they organised a doctor. Lou’s not good at all, but is now sleeping, whilst I’m not too bad. We’re medicated up, and we’ve organised to stay here another night and have one night less in Delhi. This must be the most expensive private hospital room in the world!! We hope to be feeling better in the morning and then we can decide what to do next. I can’t believe that we could come all the way to India and not see the Taj Mahal!
This looks to be an amazing hotel, if we can get to leave our room. Tomorrow is another day.

It’s now tomorrow and we look to be improving. There’s not too much point in having a room with a view of the Taj Mahal only 600 metres away, if it’s so foggy that you can’t see it! Hope to be out and about this afternoon, but much depends on Louise.

I suppose that the first thing that really sinks in is that there are people and activity everywhere. Even in the semi desert areas, when you think that you’re miles from anywhere, you cannot travel for 30 seconds without seeing someone, as well as at least one of the following – cow, water buffalo, goat, camel, monkey or dog. And the people are either going somewhere carrying something, or coming back from somewhere carrying something, or buying something, or selling something, or eating. It’s just constant movement and constant commerce. You can understand how so many Indians in the UK became market traders and corner shop owners – it’s in their genes.
The second thing Is the driving. After 200 metres of our very first dual carriageway we were faced by a JCB coming directly towards us in the outside lane. Vikram didn’t even comment on it! And bicycles and motorbikes use whatever ground is available to go in either direction – the road, the hard shoulder, the centre of the road – it’s all fair game. Vikram simply slaloms around the animals and all the other road users without slowing down. He says that the animals are very slow and very predictable – it’s the pedestrians that he has to watch! I’ve never had the camera ready at the right time to catch the motorbikes and tuk tuks passing at speed on both sides of a cow in both directions! The driving is skillful, only occasionally stupid, and NEVER seems to involve road rage.
Having walked around 3 big cities, it’s evident that some people are poor, but at the same time, there’s absolutely no evidence of starving people, and we have seen very few beggars etc. What we have seen is what appears to be a structured and busy way of life.
All the kids want to talk, calling out hello, how are you? And what is your name, but when we reply, we’ve exhausted their vocabulary. Or they don’t speak Yorkshire!
We’ve been reminded of our friends at various times. Seeing the Gateway To India reminded us of Passage Through India, our favourite restaurant in KL, and the meals with Niumal and Minona and their family. And then a Nasi Goreng last night, one of our Malaysian favourite dishes ( I know, it’s really Indonesian ) confirmed that no-one does it like Theo and Marietta! Nor the Indonesian meals prepared by Marleen and Bert. And if our memory serves us well, Dan and Greta met here in India, and lived happily ever after, travelling the world in the process.
And then today, we saw the zip wire adventure here in Jodhpur, which again, if our memory serves us well, was installed by Barbie and Owens son!
Even in the very best of the hotels there are striking examples of the complete absence of health and safety regulations. Unlit steps, different tread depths, changes in levels, sometimes water filled, flaming braziers so close to the table that I thought that Lou had caught her clothes, very low balustrades, electrical issues almost resulting in 2 fires etc. You do need to be careful.
We do seem to have been lucky with the weather though. The people we are meeting who are travelling south from Delhi are all saying how wet and cold it has been, but as we’ve moved north, the days are still hot and sunny, even though the mornings and evenings are fresh. And tomorrow we’re off to stay 2 nights on a farm, and so we will have experienced quite a good slice of Indian life. Thank you Audleys!
And then back to the food. We’re really enjoying Indian food, but after 2 weeks, we have just given our stomachs a little respite with some Asian, Arabic choices with less spices. There’s no doubt but that the food certainly keeps your digestive systems active!!
And finally, we were in the fort today and a pigeon deposited on an Indian ladies head. When we explained to Kumal that in Britain this was regarded as lucky, he said that it was the same in India – you’re lucky that elephants can’t fly!
We’re having a ball in a fantastic country.

After a lovely meal last night overlooking the lake, we were up early this morning and onto the ferry over to the landing stage. We were met by Vikram and our guide for the morning, Chadhra. Clearly one of the warrior caste, but with a great sense of humour, and excellent English, without ever having been to the UK.

He explained that Udaipur has a population of over half a million, based upon the precious metals, granites and marbles of the region, but that tourism is now the biggest industry following the filming of The Jewel In The Crown for TV and of Octopussy, the James Bond movie. Now all the worlds great stars come here to be married, or to entertain the others at the weddings. Madonna, Lady Gaga and Lionel Ritchie recently. And today at our hotel, the president of the Maldives ( not Moldova! ). Boy do these guys travel in style! What an entourage.

Anyway, Chadhra took us to the King’s Palace, his museums and gardens, and got us in before the general opening, which was a stampede! And it was amazing. The oldest monarchy in descendants in the world – over 70 consecutive monarchs. Needless to say, a humble abode!

The melange of architectural styles is fabulous, from Moghul, Arabic, European etc, and the use of glass and mirrors is truly stunning. Then onto a temple, which was very interesting, but no photos allowed. Because the King’s son is getting married here later this month, everyone is practising their singing and dancing, and it actually seems very similar to Native American Indian culture.

And I’ve made up the ceilidh band with the Indian squeeze box – bellows and keyboard, but very different design – called a melodian, I think!
We had a great time driving around Udaipur, and then walking back to the hotel through the old town. You can see why they like you to arrive by their boats on the lake!!

We had a wonderful evening last night, in an Arabic/Syrian restaurant on the 20th floor overlooking the Gateway To India. Great party, on a par with the best, but only missing the fireworks.

After a lie-in and a late breakfast, we went out into Mumbai and it’s markets. As you see more of Mumbai and get to relax into it, so it grows on you. But for the telecoms readers, the street furniture has to be seen to be believed. (See pic!) we also had our first traffic accident today, and fortunately we won! The old Fiat taxi lost. But no-one seemed too concerned.

First stop was to the lunch box men. It’s such an unbelievable story that it must be true. Many of the 6.5 million daily commuters are men and they like to have proper, hot meals at lunchtime, prepared at their homes. And so a team of lunch box men pass through the suburbs in the mornings picking up metal food containers from their homes and taking them to the stations on planks on their heads. They slide the planks onto the commuter trains, which are met at the termini by more teams, who sort out the boxes and deliver them to the men at work! The process is then reversed to return the empties for the next day!! This is amazing in itself, until you hear the numbers, which are into the billions, yes billions, each year, with next to no false deliveries. And now more amazing still – the boxes have no names on them!!! You can’t make these things up.

Everything about Mumbai is about scale–an inexpensive place to live except for real estate prices, which are the 3rd highest in the world. It’s just continuous heaving motion, all the time, everywhere. Once you’re used to that, then it’s fascinating.

We went into the food markets first, and the displays, range and quality of everything was astonishing. We felt like the tourists in St Antonin who photograph all the things that we in France take for granted. And whilst there are beggars, and callers etc, and very few Caucasians there, you feel very comfortable. We bought lots of nuts for not a lot. ( to digress, we saw some cashew trees in flower on the backwaters, and they’ll be laden with nuts in a few weeks! ) It reminded me of Leeds Market in my youth!..

After that it was the cloth, material market–simply amazing. An area the size of the whole town of St Antonin given over to just materials. We could have bought some gorgeous rolls! From there onto the silver area, the accessories area, the stainless steel area etc. it was truly fascinating.

To be with someone local, who knows her way around was wonderful. We’re just back and writing this up before something go eat this evening and then packing to leave tomorrow about 11.00 for the flight to Udaipur, where we’ ll be moving north into some much cooler weather, we believe.

We hope that the photos capture the scale and movement of Mumbai.

Well, what do we think so far?

Kerala was just as it says on the tin- quiet, undeveloped and beautiful. Except for the dawn & dusk calls to prayer from the mosques, & the party type singing & chanting from the Hindu temples ( & the roar of the surf ), it really was serene. The people at Neeleshwar were just lovely, gentle & sincere, & the whole concept is excellent. Don’t go for a riotous time, but do go for a complete wind down, yoga, cookery & Ayerverdic treatments! And the cruise on the backwaters – really a huge inlet from the Arabian Sea – was idyllic. It’s drawback? It doesn’t prepare you for India!!

The driving at first we thought was terrible, but just as in Sorrento last year, you start to see a pattern, and it’s not kamikaze! The noise is ridiculous, the constant movement remarkable, the margins for error less than 5cms, but it seems to work.

And it looks as though music is very similar the whole world over. The 4 piece band could have been straight from a ceilidh – a fiddle, a whistle/flute, a hand held drum ( can’t spell bodhran?), but no pipes! The sounds were different though.

And then Mumbai. Well, the hotel is one of the best that we’ve ever been to, except for 1 thing–it’s in Mumbai! We’ve been out this morning for a tour, & some of the architecture is stunning. Mostly from the British colonial days, but incorporating Arabic, Indian & Asian influences. The Victoria Terminal is a bigger version of St Pancras station, although not matching it’s current splendour, but even on a holiday, it’s just a seething mass of people. The juxtaposition of poverty with untold wealth is disturbing-we saw the worlds biggest “house” today, & we’re sorry that we forgot our Apples for photos, but it has 3 helipads, 600 servants etc etc & is 28 storeys high. It’s disgusting, and slap bang in the middle of a rundown area!
We’re going out again tomorrow to look around some more – the markets etc- & it is fascinating, but….

Tonight we’ll be on the top of the hotel for a NYE party, & I’ll pretend that I’m in Sydney. Only joking!

It’s just so hard to describe it accurately.

It’s evident just how much the Indians love their cricket though – never seen so much cricket being played all the time, in lovely whites, with formal umpires etc. I’m playing the old fast bowler card a lot, bit like rugby and the chasse at home!

We’ll put some pictures up as and when, but they don’t really capture it all.

We wish you all a happy, healthy & prosperous 2014!